Wednesday, July 6, 2011

FedEx Thinks I'm Fat

Whenever I experience bad customer service, I'm usually not one to write or call the company to complain. I might tell a friend or two sure, but as a rule I'll just chalk it up to someone having an off day. After all, I've worked in customer service and the last thing you need is some jackwagon yelling at you for something you either can't control or didn't do in the first place.


That was before FedEx decided my house didn't exist, actually that no house on my street existed and that I needed to lose the baby weight. It all started with this book:

(Image from Amazon)

Looks pretty cute, yes? I ordered this book (along with two others) from on June 29th with two day shipping meaning it should arrive at my house on Friday, July 1st. For whatever reason, Amazon was unable to ship this book on the 29th and instead shipped the other two books in my order via 2-day UPS on the 29th and overnighted this book via FedEx on the 30th so that it would still get to me by July 1st.

My other books arrived via UPS safe, sound and on schedule but the 1st came and went and this book never showed up. I didn't freak out too much because I knew with it being a holiday weekend, it might have gotten held up. So I when it still didn't show up by the 5th, I decided to check up on it. The note on FedEx's website said that it was undeliverable due to an "incorrect address". Huh?

**Let me take a break to say that both UPS and FedEx are on my street daily. Within the past month, I've had multiple UPS packages, one moving truck AND a warehouse truck all deliver to my house with NO problems at all.**

So I called FedEx directly and told them the address was fine. They said okay, we'll let the driver know. A few minutes later I get a call from the local FedEx facility asking me for directions. After giving said directions, they told me that I would get my package FOR SURE the next day.

Cut to this morning when I wake up to a 7:30am voice mail saying they weren't going to deliver my package because "there were no house numbers on any house" on my street and that I would have to drive to their main facility to pick up my package.

Wow, really FedEx? No address on ANY of the houses on my street?

So off Toot and I go to pick up this "kooky" book which is funny since that is what this situation has become: KOOKY. We arrive at FedEx and have to wait because they only have one attendant at the desk and she is having to run back and forth between 2 computers because apparently neither one of them work. *facepalm*

Hey look! It's a house number and it's on my street!

When she finally gets to me, I tell her my name and that I'm here to pick up and lo and behold: she can't find my box. *double facepalm* She asks me to write down my address, which I do and as she's looking it up on the two broken computers, she notices Toot and says, "Oh isn't she cute! And I see you're giving storage to another one, when are you due?" When I politely informed her that I had already given birth, she then said, "Oh! So you're what? 6, 8 months along?" *triple facepalm*

**For those of you new to the blog, please see the post entitled, "Good (and Painful) Things Come in Small Packages) where I announce that on May 9th I gave birth to Zippy.**

ANOTHER house number?? On my 'lil 'ole street? I do declare!

At this point, I'm starting to think I've gone completely insane. I'm either living in a fantasy world where my house is invisible and I'm way too fat OR I'm being Punk'd. Either way, all I can do is laugh...I mean, they're acting like I live in the middle of a jungle where mail has to be helicoptered in by a S.W.A.T. team and sent to your village on donkeys.

So she STILL can't find my package and as I'm starting to relay the whole saga, a hand comes out from their little window thingie, tosses my package and it hits the floor. Rather than go off, I just grab my package and get the hell out of there.


  1. Oh my gosh!

    Shame on them!!!

    You have a great attitude about it, but what an annoying situation.

    I too have had people think I'm pregnant after having a baby. It's so insulting. In my case, I had the itty-bitty one in my arms and the person still couldn't put two and two together. I cried. LOL.

    I hope someone from Fed-Ex reads this.

  2. Never mind face palm, jaw drop as I read this. Unbelievable.

    Luckily have never had the misfortune to have used Fed-Ex. We use UPS quite a lot what with the business and the guy knows us so well that if I'm not in he takes the packages to Craig at the unit. Ditto with our postie. Posts like yours make me realise how lucky we are.

    I agree with Nicole, hope someone from the company reads this. Customer service seems to be a rare thing these days and it makes me so angry!

  3. p.s oh yeah - and if I win your lovely giveaway I'd love something you've made Maggi as crochet still eludes me but I love the end result!

  4. Thank you for the chance - see? Still angry on your behalf, am losing my own manners! Gaaargh!

  5. I've had UPS do something weird. I was expecting a package so I was tracking it online, I noticed it said "delivered", yet, alas, no package!! I was at home and it wasn't there. How could a package be considered delivered if it wasn't *actually* delivered? Isn't that just a big 'ol lie? Turns out they were in the area & decided to "project" the delivery. Dummies.

    HOWEVER, if they ever called me fat?! I would have kicked them where the sun don't shine. Poor you. Your attitude is waaaaaaaay better than mine was. FedEx should be ashamed of themselves & their mishandling of your package. This is no way to handle your business. Boo on them!

  6. I went through something similiar with the post office. Our subdivision had been around for 3 years and suddenly my mail was being returned to the senders. Uhhhh, hello? How did the delivery driver suddenly forget an entire subdivision existed? I was waiting for a couple of Etsy orders when it happened.

    Anyhoo-since I haven't learned how to crochet yet, I'd love me something you could make from the book :-)

  7. Ohh what a dreadful experience, please, please tell me you are making a written complaint to them, include the photos of house numbers. I love crochet, this book looks fabby. Great giveaway, thankyou. X

  8. Oh my gosh Maggi, this is CRAZY! You are so nice not to have completely gone off on them! I think my head might have exploded. :)
    Thanks for the chance to win. While I wish I were talented enough to make good use of the book, that is not going to happen in this lifetime so I would be proud, thankful and honored to have something made by you from this book. I would treasure it always! :)

  9. That is quite the saga! Makes me very glad that FedEx delivered my computer way out here in the middle of nowhere!

    I would still be complaining quite a bit with those pictures to prove there are street numbers on your street. Heck, I'd even take a picture of the next FedEx truck that makes a delivery on it.

    But I am glad you got your book at last. I too love to crochet and am always on the look out for new projects.

  10. Sounds horrific. I'm so sorry. They got me good once too - I was waiting for my mortgage package to be delivered. Needed it to sign NOW. Finally checked on website, and yup, packaged delivered.

    I don't remember why - may have been checking the mail - but I wandered down to the mailbox, over 300 feet down the hill. And there, propped against the signpost with our house number next to the driveway, was my mortgage package.

    Yes, there was the FedEx envelope - sitting in the rain, unraveling at the seams, my personal information about to blow down the street.

    Yeah, I feel for you. And yet, slapping them silly is somehow illegal. So sad.

  11. You are FAR too nice!! I'd love a copy of the book!! I need to bring some kooky to this small MO town were living in. Everywhere we go people stare @ us. I may as well give them something to look @. I can't decide if I should go all retro (in your honor) eye glasses, heels, pearls, 50's dress or dye my hair blue. I can't wait to break out my Twinkie scarves this winter!!!!

  12. Oh my word, that is the most ridiculous thing ever! I sent my parents something over the winter and FedEx took it to the wrong address - there's a road with a similar name and they just delivered it there. Mind you, it's not even in the same town, but I guess they weren't worried about that. I did, however, complain, and the company sent them another package and yelled at FedEx and so it got delivered correctly the second time. I love how your neighborhood is "missing" all the street numbers. lol I'd love a copy of the book.

  13. I've had that problem with FedEx before when I lived on a double sidedtownhouse complex. They kept telling me that there was no such address and I told them that hadn't they ever wondered why all the numbers in that building were all odd numbers? Where did they think the even numbers were! If I win, I wouldn't mind you making me something. I am not good with yarn at all!

  14. I found a package in our bushes when the snow melted. I guess finding the door was too hard?? Of course the items were ruined.

    I hope you enjoy the book now that you have it.

  15. Oh honey.......... What an experience! I had one a few weeks ago with a Swchans truck. I have gone on their website.. asked to have a truck stop by... told my moms Schwan guy that I needed help getting someone to come by my place... and even called. Now mind you... I understand we live out in the country... gravel roads and old farm land... but we do have an address and a mailbox right at the end of our drive.... so... one would think a Schwans guy could stop by. Stop is the key word.... a few weeks ago.. a Schwans truck flew past our house... drivinig too fast on the gravel..and not even noticing me standing outside watching my boys play catch. Hmmmm? We must be invisible!!!!

    So story told.. I would like to be entered in your give-a-way... for the book please and thank you! :)
    God Bless!

  16. I don't know how you managed to stay so calm and polite with them!!!! I'd have been screaming down the phone at them and also at the depot!!!!! I would also have taken the photos of the house numbers with me just to prove that my street has house numbers.

    I do hope someone from their company reads your post - what a useless company they are and their customer services is totally lacking. Poor you - what a rude lady.

    If I am lucky enough to win I would love for you to make me something from the book as I can't follow a crochet pattern and can only do a basic stitch. I'm okay with knitting but not crochet.

  17. OMG What a story. I'm so sorry you had to deal with all of that. No numbers on anyones house on the whole street???? Come on now. What are they thinking?? Anyway about your giveaway, I'd like you to make something for me if I win. Thanks so much for the chance.


  18. Lol, what the heck... XD Love the package saying "NO ADRESS ON ANY HOUSE ON STREET". Well, guess they were looking at the houses literally and not the mailboxes. XD
    And the lady at the office... that's just plain rude. ^^;;

    And oh, is you giveaway only within the US?... =3

  19. OH MY GOSH that is a funny story! I know it wasn't funny when it was happening but my gosh the way you tell it is awesome!! I've had that weight thing happen to me and when it did I just went with it and made up a due date and sex of the baby. It was so awkward! Oh I almost forgot something Kooky please!

  20. that is terrible Maggi!!!

    Make me something KOOKY please!! My fingers are crossed that I win I really need my luck to turn around!!

  21. OMG!!! What an idiot! I would have felt like slugging the dumb witch! I'm sorry that happened to you, but your story was so stinking funny, I almost fell out of my chair. I think I'd like a copy of the book because in my fantasies, I'm always doing needle crafting. In real life, not so much! A girl can dream can't she? I can't believe that the idiot Fedex driver said not one but ALL the houses on the street were without an address! Sheesh! My hubby works for UPS, so I'm a little biased. It's good to know you have an excellent sense of humor, Maggie. People can be so rude these days. (Hugs) to a beautiful new mamma!

  22. WOW! You deserve a patience and dealing with stupid people award!!! This whole experience SUCKS and I bet it's due to 1 lazy driver. I had a similar situation with packages getting stolen- the USPS was leaving stuff on my stoop and never even ringing my doorbell- hello I live in BROOKLYN! Ofcourse someone stole it! It was one of the most frustrating experiences of my life. I couldn't even get my money back because the seller used delivery confirmation so USPS was able to claim the package was delivered. Long story short- I understand how annoyed you must have felt. If I win I would like something kooky- that sounds fun!

  23. Oh WOW! Sorry but I had to laugh at some of this KOOKY tale. Because I've had weird fun with Fed Ex as well. I shall share my tale...several years back, we ordered a cell phone - which was to be delivered by Fed Ex. We got a notice it shipped; but no package. We looked to see the delivery timeline and noticed that it was supposedly "delivered." We had to call and finally learned that it was delivered to the Avenue in town with the same name as ours but not DRIVE (which is our address). There is no same numbered house on that side of town. Obviously, we were NOT pleased. Good old Fed Ex told us that they would retrieve the package and deliver it to us. We were told that they left our rather expensive package on the porch of some random house on the other side of town! I couldn't believe that they actually DID manage to find it and deliver it to us!!! LOL We cringe every time we learn something has to be delivered by Fed Ex. We always indicate the southern part of town. But some people truly need to filter themselves. If you don't know, don't say it.
    Anyhow, I'd love for you to make me a kooky goody - as long as you don't send it Fed Ex! Trust me, you are NOT alone!!!

  24. Very cute story! Will you crochet me a little somethin? Thanks!!!

  25. Ha Ha what a comedy of errors. It really is a funny story now that its over and everything worked out - KOOKY indeed!
    If I win I would like you to make me something kooky.

  26. You are sooooo funny my dear! I hate bad service...especially when they give crappy excuses...

    Of course I want you to make me something...:)

  27. omygosh!! Girl.. I am CRYING cuz you have me ROLLING on this story! LOL LOL LOL!! The boys have Transformers 2 on right in front of me, everyone is getting killed, shot up... and I can NOT stop LAUGHING! LOL!!! I loveeeeeeeeeeeeeee that story! You are sooooooooooooooooooo funny!! Maybe you should have my Fed Ex lady ... she loves us (and CAN see the # on our house!) and ALWAYS brings Mr. Dandy a treat! I love her! Anyhoo... I would loveeeeeeeeeeeee to win... and would love love love love to have me a Maggi original! :):):):) Ohhhhhhhhhhh and on another funny note... I used to have this shirt that has now been torn to bits and used on a few lo's... because EVERY TIME I wore it, I was asked how far along I was... GOOD BYE SHIRT!! LOL! :):):):):):):):):):):):):)

  28. Sorry you are having these problems Maggi, so damn frustrating. My sister was having some trouble ordering 3 books for her daughter from Amazon. So many things get weird for our dealings with. Anywho I hope all turns out well and you start receiving your parcels and such on time. I wish I had something kooky from you as I can be rather kooky also :P
    Hugs to Toots and Zippy

  29. I hope someone from Fed-Ex reads this.......Customer service seems to be a rare thing these days and it makes me so angry!.....Thank you for the chance - see? Still angry on your behalf......Poor you. Your attitude is waaaaaaaay better than mine was.....How did the delivery driver suddenly forget an entire subdivision existed?......please, please tell me you are making a written complaint to them, .......Oh my gosh Maggi, this is CRAZY! the middle of nowhere!....sitting in the rain, unraveling at the seams,....You are FAR too nice!! ...most ridiculous thing ever! ...I am not good with yarn at all!...found a package in our bushes when the snow melted. I guess finding the door was too hard?? Of course the items were ruined...flew past our house...I'd have been screaming ... I'm so sorry ....that's just plain rude....and sex....My fingers are crossed......A girl can dream can't she?.....SUCKS and I bet it's .....We cringe every time...a little somethin?.....Ha Ha what a comedy of...crappy excuses...because EVERY TIME I wore it,...My sister was having some trouble!

    LOL! :):):):):):):):):):):):):)

  30. Daaaahling I feel your pain. For me its not fed ex, but the Royal Mail (england's regular post). THe mail man is horrible. He has stuffed nice goodies of mine in the mail box so tightly that i'd have to break them in order to get them out :(. I've complained but it gets me nowhere, it just leaves me more fustrated because of the help I get from customer service.
    To get such poor service from such a reputable company as fedex is unthinkable. They should be ashamed.
    *kisses* HH

  31. OH MY WORD, that is the WORST case of poor customer service I have EVER heard! That is completely insane, I can totally see why you thought you might be getting punk'd, I would of! WOW!!!! I'm glad you finally got your book, but sorry you had to go through all that! And I would love to be entered into your draw, thanks :)

  32. Oh jeez.....i thought it was only the Royal mail that had problems delivering mail (which is funny as it is their job :-P)!! Im glad you got your package in the end though....and can I just say, from the little snippets iv seen, your street is sooo cute :-)

    P.S i'd go for a one of a kind crochet from you if by some miracle I win ;-)

  33. ~ * ♥ * ~

    Oh boy Maggi ~ that totally bites! It sounds like FedEx is a proverbial pain in the butt... At least you got your book though, it would have been awful to lose it altogether.

    bonita of Depict This!
    ~ * ♥ * ~

  34. I can relate! The phone company says my house doesn't exist, but I get a bill every month! lol. I would love a copy of the Kooky Crochet! Thanks! Good luck with future deliveries!

  35. Oh dear! Sometimes I think it's better if some customer service people DON'T talk!

    I would love a copy of that book!

  36. What the what?! That's just ridiculous. I feel as though I've never had a good experience with FedEX/UPS and so I just have all packages delivered to work. I still can't believe that you had this problem what with all the mailboxes that are so clearly labeled!